Friday, March 18, 2011

Sometimes

(the following is a deep,dark rant,and if you can't handle unfortunate realities I encourage you to stop reading now.I think most PWD feel like this,at some point.)

Sometimes being the only person with diabetes sucks.

Sometimes I don't bolus for that piece of Triple Decker Death-By-Chocolate caramelized goodness.(on purpose,and I shortly rue the day..not a good idea even you are tired of diabetes)

Sometimes I forget my meter,forget lancing device,forget
strips,forget glucose,forget back up insulin,forget pump supplies,or forget money. And sometimes I forget all of those.

Sometimes I want to give up.(dark thoughts,don't go down that road)

Sometimes a blog comment really makes my day!(ok,most blog comments really make my day)

Sometimes I want to hit the Diabetes Police very,very hard.

Sometimes I can throw 100 carbs at a low & not break 120,other times I can eat 15 & voila, I'm 220.

Sometimes I wonder if a middle of the night low will be how I go.

Sometimes I wonder if there will ever be a cure.

Sometimes spontaneous combustion of tears is the sole symptom of a low blood sugar.(classy,not)

Sometimes I wonder if any of my classmates will be caring for me(in a nursing home) in 30+ years.

Sometimes the combination of Diet Coke & Spearmint gum tastes like rotten socks.

Sometimes having diabetes isn't as bad,when everyone else out there "gets it" too.

Sometimes I wonder why I'm so lucky,despite it all,when others haven't been.

Sometimes I think I'd like to beat the insurance company executives over the head & make them see that supply restrictions is not the way to contain costs,they'll simply pay for the complications later.

Sometimes I'll spot a fellow pumper in the wild.

Sometimes I'll eat twice as much of whatever I'm told not to eat,just to spite whoever said I couldn't.

Sometimes I wake up and have no idea how many carbs were actually consumed during that 3 AM low.

Sometimes I will eat sugar-free candy,and not gag.(if the situation is non-resolvable)

Sometimes I wish I had a personal Endo 24/7 who would take care of the diabetes crap while I just lived my life.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

7 comments:

meanderings said...

I relate to all of these, especially - Sometimes I'll eat twice as much of whatever I'm told not to eat,just to spite whoever said I couldn't.

It sucks - life goes on....and on...

Anonymous said...

This rings true on every point. Thank you for having the courage to write and post this. I wish I could hug you in person. Here is an internet hug (((((HUG))))).

Siobhan said...

This is a brilliant post - almost got me in tears. I just came on to blog about something similar. I just wish sometimes people got a glimpse of how relentless living with type 1 is.

asskeeper said...

I agree on everything. I especially eat the twice as much as I am told not to eat post. Just to spite said idiot. This is like the song that never ends it just goes on and on my friends....

Scott K. Johnson said...

"Sometimes I can throw 100 carbs at a low & not break 120,other times I can eat 15 & voila, I'm 220."

Sigh... Yep.

Simon said...

Hey Heidi
I think you pretty much covered it....although I might add one of my own.

Sometimes....I just want to tell you that you are awesome and inspiring!

Scully said...

YES YES YES YES.
holy crap. I don't care if you think this post was down and dark, I found it the best part of my day.