Monday, September 17, 2007

A Freudian Self- Analysis

I had a dream last night

Dreaming about tomarrow.

And while the needle, jammed into my flesh

Demands that fantasy, mix with pain

I'll still believe in Tomarrow.


Bittersweet, this nightly transendence

Into the mind's eye

Leaving the cares, the sorrows, the tears behind

However briefly.


But dreams don't stop reality from rushing in

Like an icy wave, slapping against the naked chest

Taking your breath away.


Wide awake- the pain now has a name

An infusion set gone south.

Yank cannula from leg,

And as bright red blood spurts against the once-white sheets

(Old Faithful-look at that gusher!!!)

the stress of the dream melts away.


Well, since I'm already awake, might as well check the o'le blood sugar

After changing the bedclothes.

No high, no low, graces that early morning scene.

132 mg/dl- precisely where it should be.

And yet, I marvel at the abilitity of diabetes

To steal shut-eye in another unusual way.


Sometimes, I know I have diabetes (in my dreams)

it manifests itself by frantic eating (lows)

and drinking water (highs)

Some weird form of ESP, no doubt

but this dream was just a sense of un-nameable pain

that I couldn't fix, couldn't help, couldn't wake up from.


I think that dreams,(be they subconsious, or conscious) in general, must cope with

said "thorns in the flesh"

reality bites, but life's like that.

They must coexist- you may never be a millionaire, might not make it to 100.

(statistically speaking,just not likely to happen)

Yin and Yang- pleasure and pain.

Because you can't stop dreaming, even if you wanted to.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I like:)

Cherise