End of the Week Rant

Not a good weekend(I'm not sure one could even call it a weekend!)
3rd straight week of working Saturday(s). What makes Saturdays even more special is, we come in an hour earlier.
And I am NOT a morning person. (5 AM-ugh)

My lunch(cheese, ham, and mayo on an onion bagel) went down the hatch at morning break(9:15 AM).
Immeadietly after that- I got low.
There is such irony in getting low after a nice proteinish-fat-carb snack-how much does one eat? When will the carb(s) kick in, since the protein/fat is slowing it down?
I ignored it all, and went straight for the juice.
An hour later, I'm 155. Worked out pretty good.

By lunchtime, I was starving again so I ordered Chinese. I got very tired + dizzy after lunch, thought I was going to keel over. At 2:30, I was checking my blood sugar again when my coworker came over and wanted to see my meter. She was duly impressed at how tech-ish it was.
I poked my finger, applied the blood to the strip.
5 seconds later- I whipped the strip out, covered up the number w/my hand, and told her "Hey look, I'm perfect!"
"Yeah," she said sceptically, and started walking away.
"Wanna know something else?"
She turned around. "What?"
"I sucked the blood off my finger."
"Ewwwwwwww!" She makes a face, and that totally makes my day.
The number on my meter, unfortuantly, is not quite "perfect", but my type 2 coworker would not understand this one at all. I'm not even sure I do.
524.
Darn Chinese.
Maybe I can blame my whacky sense of humor on my blood sugar (PLUS sleep deprivation of the night before)
I bolus.
And bolus again(4 pm)
And rush off to the research study center, fill out paperwork for the next 30 minutes.

How often, on a scale of 1-5, do you:
Feel like smashing your meter?
Overtreat your low blood sugars?
Felt CONFIDENT in treating your low blood sugars?( I have never in my life felt confident while treating my lows!)
Worry about:
Passing out
nocturnal hypoglycemia
Appearing stupid
hurting yourself because of hypoglycemia
hurting others because of hypoglycemia
Etc....

I've just had my diabetes anylized to the nth degree-and I think I failed.

I did learn something interesting today-its NOT accepted protocal to pay a research study patient cash. (researcher could get in trouble for that) I was in a study once, didn't get in but they still payed me $50 cash after it was over. It did take several hours + was pretty hard to do.
(as in, breathing the antidote to albuterol, stimulating an asthma attack while doing peak respiratory monitoring) I failed that study, my asthma isn't bad enough.(fortuantly) But anyway, the D research study person wants to start giving out checks when the study patients come in- apperently some people aren't getting the checks(in the mail). Sounds like a good idea to me, I wouldn't have to wait 2 months on a check.

Finally down to 109(5:30 pm), I have a sudden craving for Starbucks (cold) coffee, a Moonpie, and an eggroll. The eggroll was left over from lunch, the Starbucks and Moonpie I get from the hospital cafeteria. Thank goodness not everything in that cafateria is healthfood.

Time to go to bed now-morning comes early.