Project: Organization D-Junk

I've fallen in love with the greatest personal organizer...ever.




Found it at Michaels(crafting supply store in the US). I'm sure variations exist in any hardwear/craft store..but I like this particular one because its just perfect for my D-needs.If you're like me, & your bedside stand is a confusing jumble of used test strips,candy wrappers, and other D-(& one low can create that in a hurry)... Then you'll recognize the need to have something to maintain order from the chaos. This fits that need...perfectly.

It's a 8" x 6" x 6" stand up organizer..the perfect size for a nightstand (or dresser).



It has 1 large central space..the perfect size for a bottle of glucose tabs (&/or a can of Diet Coke...)



Just off the central compartment, two smaller compartments can house your D-supplies quite comfortably. (I have my PDM/strips/lancing device in one..and a spare pod/insulin vial/syringe on the other side. They don't get mixed up,and I can deal with each situation separately.I don't have to worry about spilling Diet Coke into a sea of used test strips already covering my phone.









There are 4 side (2 in each side)pockets..great for tucking a roll of glucose tabs or pack of candy into. (or an empty canister,to dispose of used test strips)




Or even a CGM receiver. (no more searching the room because you aren't sure where that shrieking is coming from)



Finally, there is another (open) pouch off the one side...and a velcroed pouch off the other.(perfect for anything else you might need...like a phone(to tweet those early morning "Diabetes Sux!?!" messages...) or a pack of breath mints...or a small pack of tissues after reading an especially emotional blog post...






And the stand-up handle is awesome..it could almost be a purse or murse.(there is a paisley inside print,but the one I got is a pretty solid black on the outside & tape could be placed,to obscure what is showing,if that offended you. It also came in purple/pink at the craft store. Neither of those is a favorite color of mine,so I went with the black. Although the inside print is hardly noticeable.) It's very portable,very trip-friendly, and I think I'll be going back to get several of these. (at $6.99, a reasonable price,IMO)

(as always,no one paid me to write this..the opinions expressed therein are my own & I paid for said product out of my own pocket.)

What do you use to keep your D-stuff organized?
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Scare Yourself Every Day: The D-Chronicles

I'm not sure what I was expecting...something like the above, perhaps. (it didn't look like that at all)

Anyhow, I came, I saw,I signed 3 consent forms & was duly eye dilated(R) up. Was taken back to a separate waiting room where two other patients joined me as the baby made shrieking noises to pass the time. Dr. S(paghettio),my ever so buyount opthamologist came to take us over to the lasaring room (where I parked the baby stroller in the corner),& put my head on the device rest.

Click. Click. Click. SNAPPPP. It wasn't painful to the eye, but the frequency was horribly unpleasant to my ears.

"This can't possibly be painful," said Dr. Spaghettio, noting the look of deep consternation on my face.

SNAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP.


"Not painful to the eye..it just sounds horrible."

SNAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP.

(I think that was my brain-this is not a pleasant experience.)


"There is no way this can be painful!" Dr. S. continued to insist.

(whatever, dude. I don't think you've ever had a lasar zapping around inside your eye

before.)

SNAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP. (IS IT OVER YET?!?)


"A few more zaps...you have a huge pupil." (why thank you)

SNAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP.

It was only a few minutes of this, yet felt like lightyears.

"All done! See you in a month."

"Great." I get up from the chair, locate my baby and my sunglasses, and roll on out
of there. "I hope that's done it."

Later that day....

(painkiller time. I'm not sure where he got the idea that said lasaring is never
painful,maybe because he's never had a patient under the age of 40 to go through this. Perhaps older people have a higher tolerance to pain then younger folks.)


It seems to have been somewhat effective...I'm hoping a few more days & it'll be as good as the left eye. Anyhow, I can now cross that one off my Reverse Bucket List. (I'm sure it won't be the last time a lasar goes zapping around in there).

6 Months: Moments

Mr. Studious.



Attack the Mickey!!



Teeth: we've got two!



Smearing my hair with applesauce.



Happy baby.



Unhappy baby.


Nemo kisses.



We love our feetsies...they taste soooo good.



We's a fan.

Peekaboo!

Hair today, gone tomorrow.

Enchanted.

Not sure what to think of this stuff called...food. (4 months old)



Mickey Ears.



Getting measured for a helmet.



Starting the Day...



And ending it.

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FFL: Making the Outliers, Inliers

(if I were a dot on this graph, I'd have been to the farrrr right)

In 2005, I boarded a plane bound for Florida...bound for this place I'd heard about, called Friends for Life. To say that I was nervous would be the understatement of the year. (I was going to room with someone I'd barely met from the Internet chatroom) I didn't know a soul. (and I also didn't tell my parents where I was going, lest they unduly freak out. Wise, nu?)

When I got there, there was no red carpet, no welcoming committee. The CWD young adults of today were still teens, doing teen stuff..and I was at the wayyyy far end of that bell curve, struggling to see where I could fit into all this. Yes, I could pretend to be a teenager(I still looked like one) but in the end, I (& my friend) were out in the cold.

(and that is how I found myself volunteering to chaperone a bunch of crazy teens...at midnight. Never again, is all I can say.Although I respect each and everyone who does so, that's not my cup of tea.)

Seven years later, I don't feel alone (above and beyond the baby/husband in tow factor) anymore when I go to that conference-there are friends everywhere. And that (semi-crazy) fellow PWD that I met off the internet is now a very good friend, not the ax-murderess one would assume they would be. I've grown as a person (one who wouldn't say two words at that first conference,I've always been somewhat of an introvert) and a PWD(knowledge base= double arrows up). And the friends I've met haven't been limited to fellow PWD...spouses of PWD, siblings of PWD, exhibiters, as well as parents of CWD.(it takes a village, and all that jazz)


Many more "outliers" are coming to FFL now..and those teenagers are growing up, getting married,etc. The bell curve is shifting and its not such an odd thing anymore to go to a "Children with Diabetes" conference.

But it still is a "Children with Diabetes" conference, and while more adult programming is making its way into it, at its core, it seems like that will never change. Too earth-shattering to change to "Children and Adults with Diabetes." Not to mention it probably won't sit well with Johnson and Johnson.It started out CWD, and will likely remain so. And for some adults,that's likely to be a point of major contention.

So where is this all going? I don't know. But I can't help feeling that somewhere down the proverbial pike, CWD is going to be faced with that decision (to change the name) because so many adults with D will be coming to this conference..and the fallout may not be pretty. I personally don't care about the name, I love it regardless (people don't ostrocize you just because you don't have a CWD) but it does infer a certain stand-offish status to those who don't have a CWD. CWD is going to have to adapt to this and the shift in the bell curve, perhaps very soon/very quickly (depending on how many T1's do decide to come,and judging from what I read on FB/Twitter there's alot of interest out there). The adult programming is coming along pretty well,they've had some great sessions this year. Scholarships for (adult) PWD also need to be established.

I think that there's room under this big o'le umbrella for us all...CWD or not. (we all need somewhere to feel normal/loved/accepted)

The Laser & The Type One

I've got alot to say about the awesomeness that was Friends For Life...but the most important thing to take care of (post-conferance)was a follow-up with my eye doctor. (each year, they offer a pretty in-depth screening..photographing everything & giving you pics to take home with you. This year, they used a new piece of technology that photographed the thickness of the retina...& detects any "air pockets" that could mean future vessel issues) Well,last fall (in the final weeks of pregnancy)a floater popped up in my right eye(duly freaking me out)..& it wasn't anything significant, just related to age. I just had to learn to live with it. Which I did. However, this year's FFL eye scan revealed complete clouding of my right eye lens & they recommended going back to the eye doctor. (yet again)

So I did that. I really like my eye doctor, he looks like Brad Pitt's (younger) brother. (and he doesn't rip into me about my current a1c) Dilated up,and he spent like 3 minutes looking around, leaned back,and announced that the R eye definetly needed that laser (the left eye isn't to the point of occluding vision yet). I guess since the floater occurred,I've just learned to live with the not-so-sharp vision.

This kind of laser burns a hole through the "sac" overgrowth that obscures the lens. (months/years after cataract surgery) It isn't D-related,& it supposedly isn't painful.However,it is a procedure (and thus,had to be scheduled for "Procedure Day")& like anything else eyeball related,they have to give you a list of (extremily rare) scary potential side effects.(and now I see why you wouldn't want it done unless the eye was completely clouded) I have hope that it will clear up the cloudiness in that eye some. (which I had assumed to be from floaters) It isn't exactly like having cataracts was,because I was stone cold blind from those,& its only noticable in that one eye. Anyway, I'm ready to just get this done...& hopefully, it will help. Once that eye is done, the problem won't reoccur in that eye.(there's the other one sometime down the line, to be dealt with then) Virtually everyone who has an IOL implant for cataracts has to get this laser done..so I don't feel like its my fault or anything.My retinas, thankfully, are still doing fine.

Wordless Wednesday: Growing

A Few Good T-Cells

Many people with diabetes (myself included) fight the continual auto-immune wars.

Yes, we're hot (autoimmune) messes. Type 1 diabetes, celiac disease,thyroid
disorders,etc.etc.etc.



I imagine my thyroid cells like champions of yore (perhaps the Spartans and their Battle of
Thermopolae) , defending that pass, down to the last cell. Or perhaps those
t-cells that currently do
battle against my thyroid aren't of the same caliber/brutality as the ones that
finished off my islets. For my thyroid has been dealing with this onslought for
about 14 years now...concurrently with my diagnosis of type 1 diabetes. I've been
off/on Synthroid several times,pregnancy tends to increase the "needing help"
factor,but it keeps a lickin' and keeps on ticken.' My Endo (very much the thyroid
person, she is convinced all T1's are headed for being messed up in that dept.)
keeps watch over it with a wary eye...it's anyone's guess when it will die for
good.) I'm not really worried about it,when it happens, it happens,and its probably
the easiest organ function to self-regulate.(pop a daily pill)


Family Fun Fact: there's an additional autoimmune disease prevalient in my family.
Rheumatoid Arthritis is it's name, and both my Grandma and Mom had/have it.
It's a very genetic disease, and much as I don't like to think about it,it's
probably coming for me. Now that I've A. passed 30 B. survived pregnancy, for the
past couple of months my joints have been stiff/hurting. Ignoring it/doing more
exercises/self-medicating/etc. hasn't really improved the situation, so I went to my
doctor for some screening bloodwork (and checking for anything else, like Lyme
disease). Most of the time it shows up after kids (like 40+), but I think that it'll
probably go after me early(given that I don't intend to have 6 kids and spend the
majority of my 30's pregnant). Pregnancy is a state of immuno-comprimisation, so
that's why I think whatever's going on has waited till now to strike. If I do have
another auto-immune disease,it's going to be tough to deal with(LEAVE ME ALONE,
DISEASE). Diabetes is one of those things that you hope you can live a semi-healthy
long life with,but there's not much comfortable about a progressively debilitating
disease. (Plan B: go ahead and have six kids so that they can take care of me when
I'm too arthritic to care for myself & my husband, being 13 years older then me, may
not still be alive)

I really, really, hope I'm wrong,even Lyme disease sounds like a good alternative.
(easily treatable, end of situation)

The Girl in the Plastic Bubble*

(this is as bubble-ish as I can get us. I'm not a Photo-Shop Pro)


Sometimes it feels like we live our lives in a plastic bubble.


"Don't eat that."

"Exercise."

"Don't live alone."

"Keep your a1c under 6.5, and your risk of complications will be seriously decreased."

"Be sure to floss/brush/get regular checkups/never cut your toenails yourself/don't go barefoot/don't procreate without permission/don't drink more then 2 drinks/blahblahblahblahblah..."

That list goes on. We are, in the eyes of the media, healthcare profession, and the general public...a fragile species,that needs to be sheltered from the big bad world. (that will kill us) Our plastic bubble (of rules and regulations) will keep us safe.


But the thing about plastic bubbles is, you can't stay in them forever. Just like John Travolta's character had the yearning to rebel & go live life on his own terms,(regardless of how scary that was) we have to let diabetes conform to our lives...not the other way around. We can't live in a hospital (above and beyond the fact that you'd not be living very long in there anyway, with the rate of iatragenic infections) and reciting of the mantra "What would my Endo Do?" (in said situation)doesn't always jive with what we want. You've got to balance life with diabetes & keep on keeping on.

Run marathons.


Have babies.


Go be a world-class surgeon. (or firefighter, chef, Indy race car driver, etc.)


I am not a girl in a plastic bubble. I am not "fragile", to be lumped in with a million other PWD you may have come in contact with. I am unique,
on my own journey & not about to take the opinion of your brother's girlfriend's mom's first cousin-once-removed opinion about my disease. And till the day I die, I won't be defined by the lack of a functioning organ.


*(If you've ever seen the movie "The Boy in the Plastic Bubble"...(starring John Travolta)you'll have caught the reference.)

Confessions of a Diabetic Mommy: The Top Eleven

#1 My child is witness to the sprouters, sprayers, gushers, finger pricks, pod changes, dexcom changes,and simeraly gory D-Acts 24 hours a day, seven days a week. At this age it shouldn't be upsetting,but I don't know, I'm probably scarring him for life (and setting him up for many future therapy sessions). I know toddlers definetly don't like seeing blood(I once checked my blood sugar while baby-sitting one and she started screaming, at top volume). He just smiles, and enjoys looking at his momma (probably the only time in his life he'll enjoy doing so).


#2 Our first family vacation will be a Diabetes Conference. (and likely many more) How utterly geek-y and appearingly not-fun is that? (it is actually very fun, but a normal person would probably pity the poor little soul) It's Orlando, it's summer...so there's not just the conference going on.(although he's rather too young to do anything this go-around)


#3 Sometimes, when I'm especially sleep deprived,(or low) I'll ask him "Are we low?", drink a juice box, feed him, and go back to bed. Low=cranky=feed both of us, in my mixed up brain. And if I'm not low, I'll wake up later with a high bg. (he isn't D, or hypoglycemic,and I'm very grateful for that)

#4 Sometimes (when I'm low) I'll drink the juicebox while he screams to be fed...and feel like the world's worst mom. (Dear Passersby: there's a reason I'm staring blankly at my screaming child, I swear there is. Don't judge unless you've been there)


#5 Test strip bottles make excellent rattles.


#6 Pod-y and Dexcom sensors are very tempting to little fingers. (which like to yank and grab anything and everything)They don't get anywhere near his mouth, however.

#7 I still leave test strips at random spots around the house..I need to d-proof the place, before he starts to crawl. (don't want him to be eating test strips!)

#8 Most of his friends will probably be connected to the DOC/D-World (in one way or the other). Eh. (not bad..just weird)

#9 He loves looking at my lighted Dexcom graph...and pretty much anything else with a light.

#10 I've already dipstick-checked several of his super-saturated diapers for ketones/glucose. Neurotic mother that I am, if he is going to get diabetes,I'd rather be knowing sooner rather then later. No, his kidneys just work well (and its summertime). I will not do anything invasive,& I'm not going to make his childhood unlivable, I'm going to let him be a kid. (and I'm also not going to do the Trial Net Study, because that would be even worse)But I am going to be vigilant for the signs.(should they occur,knock wood that they never do)

#11 I've wondered if a PWD had a low while locked in a room with nothing but a breast pump and a glucose meter,could they drink the breast milk (or would the act of extracting it make them even lower) Milk really doesn't have enough carbs to raise one quick enough,but its a rather fascinating concept...that you could save your own life.


I hope we don't screw up our child too badly.

Black

I cannot sleep tonight. That lump of coal,formerly known as my stomach,pitches & rolls like a ship on the high seas. The D-gods are angry,& the skies above are pitch black...interspersed with the ketone strikes of lightening.(coincedentily, so is the weather outside) And Diabetes laughs at my puny attempts at "control."

241. Probably have ketones,but improved over 12 hours ago, as my blood sugar went from 155 to 600+ in a matter of hours. (I'd eaten the routine breakfast of oatmeal & bolused appropriately) But it was a new pod,& not a good one,as I very shortly found out. Being greeted by that HIGH was a freak-out moment of epic proportions,the last time I've had one of those had been at least 6 years. I took a shot,& rechecked an hour later. Still high. I do not know what to do with a number I can't see,so I packed up the Bairn & we went to the ER,which resulted in a 525 bg at triage(I felt stupid,as I was obviously coming down). Cue stomachache. Blood sugar dropped to 404 by time of being seen,IV fluids & Zofran & 10 units later was 202 & discharged with orders to call Endo. tomorrow.(not in DKA)(Wee Bairns dad picked him up & took home,many hours before.Wee Bairn thought it was a very interesting place & charmed everyone he came in contact with.)

I need Zofran,& I need a listening ear(on my blood sugars) & a shoulder to cry on,words can't express how much I hate diabetes right now.It sucks.

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Dblog Week: Hero (II)

Once upon a morning dreary
As I woke up, dragging wearily
Diet Coke was there-for me
And life was all that it should be.

It's not easy having D
Even worse to live with me
Diabetes ups and downs
Tic Tacs,wrappers, Almond Mounds.

Have I ever said that you're my hero?
Crazy, crazy, stupid lows
The one whose arms still hold me tight
Through my blurry, shaky sight.

Bills that stack upon the chair
Frequent doctors, frequent care
There is no break, there is no cure
The way things are, is how they were.

Truly on this ride called life
The highs and lows, the joys and strife
Interwoven with disease
Nothing really comes with ease.

To my wonderful type 3
I pledge to (try to) keep my a1c
Against it's bad effects assuaged
Well preserved,into old age.

Have I ever said that you're my hero
The only one who loves me so
You're everything sweet at 60 mg/dl
As I'm scarfing sugar pills.

(to the hero's in your life...make sure you appreciate them!)

Dblog Week: Saturday Snapshots

Back for the third year, let’s show everyone what life with diabetes looks like! With a nod
to the Diabetes 365 project, let’s grab our cameras again and share some more d-related pictures.
Post as many or as few as you’d like. Feel free to blog your thoughts on or explanations of your pictures,
or leave out the written words and let the pictures speak for themselves.

Coasters.

I don't need no stinkin' control.

Mama, I think you're low.

But sometimes the stars aline.

A better day.

A Rattle!

We CAN eat these.

The Back-up Plan.

Stockpiled.

Yes, it does.

Screen of Death.

Mac-Gyvered.

Can I get a repeat? (on the last 24 hours)

Fondly dubbed "The Cockroach" by my loving spouse.

I love to bungee-jump.

A day in the life.

(don't leave home without it!!)